


Sweet Release

by blacknblue



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Crossdressing, Crossdressing Kink, Gen, Humiliation, Lingerie, Masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-05-14
Packaged: 2018-10-31 20:30:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10906923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blacknblue/pseuds/blacknblue
Summary: Cassian finally enjoys himself after months away from home.





	Sweet Release

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the first piece of fan fiction I've written in years and the first piece I've ever published online. Please enjoy my shamefully self-indulgent one-shot with a very silly ending and I'm sorry for any glaring errors, I haven't thoroughly edited it.

It didn't mean anything. 

Cassian closed the door to his quarters behind him. It had been so long -too long- since he had returned to the ship which was the closest thing he could call home. The air in his quarters smelt stale. No one had been in here since he had left on his mission for the Alliance nearly two months before. Good, he had requested everything be left as it was, and since being promoted to captain, the crew were happy to obey. Besides, there wasn't anything of interest in here. A life of stolen identities and tracking the secrets of the empire had taught him to travel light. There was no sentiment to his possessions; a blaster, the clothes on his back and enough coin for him to disappear quickly if necessary. Sentiment did not belong in the rebellion. The alliance was on the brink of all out war with the empire, it had no time for human endearments and desires, and normally, neither did Cassian.

He shrugged his pack to the floor, letting the tension in his shoulders release. The missions took their toll on his body, his joints ached and begged for bed, and already he knew there was a string of bruises up his right side from a scuffle with an imperial group.

It's just release. 

His fingers fumbled to unzip the parka and he quickly tossed that to the floor as well. Blaster out, on the table by the bed (paranoia maybe. But paranoia feels better than a knife in the back.) Shirt off- faster now- his body's demands catching up with him, exhaustion and tension and need coiled in his stomach. The leather belt cracked satisfyingly as he ripped it off and the sound sent a shiver through him. Boots and trousers followed, until he stood naked, vulnerable and shivering in the only room in the galaxy he dared call home. 

He stood motionless for a second, as he did every night he returned here, torn by desire and guilt and a burning shame. Finally he turned towards the bed. With loud cracks of protest from his aching joints he reached under its frame and pulled out a unspectacular bag. 

It's just release, he told himself sternly, nothing more. It's just-

He reached into the bag and pulled out the lingerie. Matching embroidered black silk. He ran the material between his fingers, marvelling despite himself at its smoothness, the intricate embroidered pattern and the delicate finishing of lace around the edges. In his blistered, war-torn hands it felt so fragile, like the manifestations of a fevered dream that may disappear into mist with a single breath. 

Hastily, he got to his feet. Panties first. He slipped them first over one foot, then the next and already his breath was becoming ragged at the feeling of silk against his skin. He pulled them up to his hips. Already his cock was straining against the fabric, the head glistening with pre-cum. It had been so long since he'd properly pleasured himself. The desire and need he had beaten down for so long was rising up to take control, and Cassian happily gave way to it. Taking his cock in his fist he gave himself one slow stroke. Pleasure shook through his body.  
Not yet though, he wasn't ready to fully lose control yet. 

Untwisting the bra from itself, he reached up and slipped it on, fumbling clumsily with the clasps behind his back. He fiddled with the straps, adjusted it and fussed until he couldn't put it off any longer.

Finally he turned and faced the full length mirror that hung opposite the bed. 

The first thing that struck him was how much older he looked. The circles under his eyes had darkened, leaving his face looking haggard and gaunt. His ribs and clavicle jutted out from under his grime-covered skin and the bruises down his side were turning an ugly shade of purple. He looked as broken and exhausted as he felt. The contrast of the delicate silken underwear on his frame was almost jarring and his cheeks flushed with shame. 

If anyone ever saw him like this-  
He was a mess-  
an embarrassment on his family and the alliance- 

And yet  
He fingered the material of the panties. The way it framed his hips was almost graceful and the curve of the bra shaped his body into something delicate, something softer.  
Perhaps he could be fragile. Perhaps he could be something pure.

His hand brushed over his cock and the sensation dragged him into reality. He needed the release he'd been denying himself for so long. 

He dropped onto the bed, one hand already forming a fist around his cock, the other reaching to tease at his chest. Lying back, he let the pleasure wash over him as he stroked himself in long, practiced rhythms. 

His thoughts vaguely turned to memories of distant partners, men and women and others who'd smiled and whispered pretty things in his ear in bars on planets he couldn't even remember the names of. They'd lead him to their rooms and they would fuck, hard and rough and dirty - a twisted mess of two empty beings searching for some primal feeling- until they were both satisfied and exhausted and then he would leave, sometimes with a goodbye, sometimes without a look back. 

Mostly though Cassian preferred to let the pleasure rather than fantasies dictate his movements. The friction of silk, slick with pre-cum, against his cock drove him insane and he started thrusting up to meet his hand, panting and moaning through gritted teeth. Out of the corner of his eye he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror; spread out on his back, the panties outlining his cock and hand, and the other hand fingering his nipples through the material of the bra. It was depraved and wrong and so so right. 

The waves of pleasure shook him as he felt himself getting closer and closer to cumming. He moved his hand from the bra into the panties without breaking rhythm with the other. He'd forgotten lube, he silently cursed himself, but it wasn't important now. Running a finger around his entrance and then teasing the tip of another into himself was enough. A loud moan escaped his lips as he came, cum shooting over his hands and stomach.

The door opened. Cassian froze, hand still wrapped round his cock. A familiar droid peered around the doorway.

'I take it this is a bad time?' 

Cassian swore he could hear amusement in the droids monotone voice.

'KAY-TU' Cassian bellowed. His voice shook from the last waves of pleasure still emanating through his body. He could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks. 'GET OUT.'

'Okay, okay,' the robot turned and sauntered out the door, 'And I calculate there's an 86.25% chance you hope I will not mention this to anyone.'

'KAY TU'

'Alright alright, keep your panties on.'


End file.
